I want my child to be average.

How do I measure my success as a parent if my children are simply average?

Don’t misunderstand me; I don’t want my child to struggle or be unhappy.

I think we’re too quick to attach a negative meaning to the word “average.” We assume that to be average is to live a substandard life in some way when that’s not the case at all.

I do have dreams about my kid being wildly successful and happy and amazingly talented at everything he attempts (of course), but my goal as a parent is to give him permission to be simply average.  Continue reading “I want my child to be average.”

The “Perfect” Birth

Hard-earned lessons on letting go of perfectionism and embracing the messy realities of becoming a mother.

Y’all, when it comes to birthing, I was perfect. I had a vaginal, un-medicated birth and my daughter was healthy and beautiful. Aren’t you impressed? Well, hang on just a sec and let me give you a little context for my “perfection.”

When Rue came out all slippery and purple, the midwives placed this strange squish on my chest and I remember feeling… relief… then… not much. Lots of women talk about feeling a rush of overwhelming love when their babies are born, but not me. I was mostly just glad it was all over, and then everything else was a disconnected blur. I remember speaking in a voice that didn’t sound like my own. I remember staring at the swirl pattern her ears made. And I remember the disappointment. Everything, including my beautiful baby, looked perfect, but it felt far from it.  Continue reading “The “Perfect” Birth”